6 HAFTAY - MOST HILARIOUS SARDAR JOKES

Sardar 👳 apni bivi k sath ja rha tha, rastay mein uss ne dekha k police 🚔 uss k dost ko pakar kr lay ja rahi thi.

Sardar: "Kiya hua?"

Dost: "Bas yar main ne apni bivi 👧 ko mar diya hai, ab mujhay 6 haftay jail mein rehna parray ga...

Sardar: "Sirf 6 haftay?"

Yeh keh kr sardar ne police 👮 walay se bandooq li or apni bivi 👩 ko bhi mar diya.

Dost 👨: "Oye khoteya puri bat to sun liya kr... 6 haftay jail mein rehnay k baad mujhay phansi lag jaye gi."

Sardar 👳 ji abhi tak hosh mein nhi aaye.

Hahaha 😂😂😂

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EMERGENCY CALL - VERY FUNNY JOKE

Boy: *calls 📱 911* Hello? I need your help!

911: Alright, What is it?

Boy: Two girls 👧 are fighting over me!

911: So what's your emergency?

Boy: The ugly 😬 one is winning.

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THE BOTHERING CUSTOMER - HILARIOUS JOKES

A customer was bothering the waiter in a restaurant. First, he asked that the air conditioning be turned up because he was too hot, then he asked it be turned down cause he was too cold, and so on for about half an hour.
Surprisingly, the waiter was very patient, he walked back and forth and never once got angry. So finally, a second customer asked him why he didn't throw out the pest.
"Oh, I really don't care or mind," said the waiter with a smile. "We don't even have an air conditioner."

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VERY FUNNY POLICE JOKES - MESSAGE

A woman reported the disappearance of her husband to the police.

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The officer looked at the guy's photograph, questioned her, and then asked if she wanted to give her husband any message if they found him.

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"Yes, please" she replied: "Tell him Mother didn't come after all."

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VERY FUNNY ENGLISH JOKES - POLICEMAN

A policeman pulls a man over for speeding and asks him to get out of the car.

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After looking the man over he says: "Sir, I couldn't help but notice your eyes are bloodshot. Have you been drinking?"

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The man gets really indignant and says: "Officer, I couldn't help but notice your eyes are glazed. Have you been eating doughnuts?"

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REALLY FUNNY SARDAR JOKES - CHOR SARDAR

Sardar chori karnay aik ghar mein ja ghussa...

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Malik makan: "Kaun hai wahan?"

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Sardar: "Meeaown, meeaown...."

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Malik makan: "Aray kaun hai?"

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Sardar: "Billi ey baghairta billi..."

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REALLY FUNNY SARDAR JOKES - SHADI SHUDA

Police: "Park mein aisay kion baithay ho?"
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Sardar: "O paa g, ham dono shadi shuda hein."
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Police: "To phir ghar mein baitho na?"
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Sardar: "Asal mein ghar mein iss ka shohar aur meri biwi mind kar jatay hein."

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VERY FUNNY ENGLISH JOKES - DAMN

Old meaning of sorry: "I won't do it again."

New meaning of sorry: "Damn I got caught, next time I need to be more careful..."

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HILARIOUS JOKES - BLONDE POLICE OFFICER

A blonde walks into the police department looking for a job. The officer wants to ask her a few questions....

Officer: What's 2+2?

Blonde: Ummmmm... 4!

Officer: What's the square root of 100?

Blonde: Ummmm... 10!

Officer: Good! Now, who killed Abraham Lincoln?

Blonde: Ummmm... I dunno.

Officer: Well, you can go home and think about it. Come back tomorrow.

The blonde goes home and calls up one of her friends, who asks her if she got the job.

The blonde says, excitedly, "Not only did I get the job, I'm already working on a murder case!"

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HILARIOUS JOKES - THE ACQUAINTANCE

An elderly couple was driving across the country. While the woman was behind the wheel, the couple was pulled over by the highway patrol.

“Ma’am, did you know you were speeding?” the officer said.

The woman, hard of hearing, turned to her husband and asked, “What did he say?”

“He said you were speeding!” the old man yelled.

The patrolman then asked, “May I see your license?”

The woman turned to her husband again, “What did he say?”

The old man yelled back, “He wants to see your license!”

The woman then gave the officer her license.

“I see you are from Arkansas,” the patrolman said. “I spent some time there once and went on a blind date with the ugliest woman I’ve ever seen.”

The woman turned to her husband again and asked, “What did he say?”

The old man replied, “He said he knows you!”

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HILARIOUS JOKES - GETTING INTO THE HOUSE

A man went to the Police Station wishing to speak with the burglar who had broken into his house the night before.

"You'll get your chance in court." said the Desk Sergeant.

"No, no no!" said the man. "I want to know how he got into the house without waking my wife. I've been trying to do that for years!"

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HILARIOUS JOKES - MUCH THE SAME WAY

A doctor had just bought a villa on the French Riviera, when met an old lawyer friend whom he hadn’t seen in years, and they started talking. The lawyer, as it turned out, owned a nearby villa. They discussed how they came to retire to the Riviera.

“Remember that lousy office complex I bought?” asked the lawyer, “Well, it caught fire, and I retired here with the fire insurance proceeds. What are you doing here?”

The doctor replied, “Remember that real estate I had in Mississippi? Well, the river overflowed, and here I am with the flood insurance proceeds. It’s amazing that we both ended up here in pretty much the same way.”

“It sure is,” the lawyer replied, looking puzzled, “but I’m confused about one thing – how do you start a flood?”

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HILARIOUS JOKES - THE CRIME

Policeman: I've had my eye on you for some time now.
Young Lady: That's funny. I thought you were arresting me for speeding.

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FUNNY REAL ANSWERS - FEMALE DRIVERS

Real answers given by Women Drivers in the California Driving Test:

Question: What are some points to remember when passing or being passed?
Answer: Make eye contact and wave “hello” if he/she is cute.

Question: What is the difference between a flashing red traffic light
and a flashing yellow traffic light?
Answer: The color.

Question: Do you yield when a blind pedestrian is crossing the road?
Answer: What for? He can’t see my license plate.


Question: When driving through fog, what should you use?
Answer: Your car.

Question: What changes would occur in your lifestyle if you could no
longer drive lawfully?
Answer: I would be forced to drive unlawfully.

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FUNNY SHORT JOKES - SEARCH FOR MONEY

A thief broke into my house last night. He was searching for money...
So, I woke up and started searching with him!

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FUNNY SHORT JOKES - DEALING WITH A BURGLER

A woman woke her husband in the middle of the night and told him "There is a burglar downstairs in the kitchen and he is eating the cake that my mother made for us."
The husband said, "Who shall I call, the police or an ambulance?"

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HILARIOUS JOKES - THE DRUNKARD

A drunkard was hauled in court.

Judge: So, you are here for drinking.
Drunker: Awesome! When do we start the next session of drinking, sir?

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HILARIOUS JOKES - THE JEWISH SAMURAI

In days long past, a Chinese emperor needed a new samurai to be his personal bodyguard. He sent out a message to all the lands summoning the best warriors to his court in three years time.

The day of the summoning arrives, and only three warriors present themselves.

The first, a Japanese Samurai, stepped forward. He opened a matchbox to release a fly into the air. With a slash of his sword, the tiny fly drops to the ground, chopped in half.

The second, a Chinese Samurai, stepped forward. He too opened a matchbox to release a mosquito into the air. With two quick chops, the mosquito dropped dead in four pieces.

The third, a Jewish Samurai, stepped forward. He opened his matchbox to set a small fruit fly flying in the air. He slashed the air, but the fruit fly continued to fly.

The Emperor, disappointed, asked why the fruit fly was not dead.

The Jewish Samurai replied, "If you look closely, you will notice that the fruit fly was just circumcised."

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HILARIOUS JOKES - PRETENDING MARRIED

A man and a woman who had never met before find themselves in the same sleeping carriage of a train. After the initial embarrassment they both go to sleep, the man on the top bunk, the woman on the lower.

In the middle of the night the man leans over, wakes the woman and says, “I’m sorry to bother you, but I’m awfully cold and was wondering if you could possibly get me another blanket?”

The woman leans out and, with a glint in her eye says “I have a better idea, just for tonight, let’s pretend that we’re married!”

The man says happily, “Sure. That sounds great!”

The woman says, “Good… get your own fucking blanket!”

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HILARIOUS JOKES - LEGAL ADVICE

A doctor and a lawyer were talking at a party.
Their conversation was constantly interrupted by people describing their ailments and asking the doctor for free medical advice.
After an hour of this, the exasperated doctor asked the lawyer, “What do you do to stop people from asking you for legal advice when you’re out of the office?”
“I give it to them,” replied the lawyer, “and then I send them a bill.”
The doctor was shocked, but agreed to give it a try.
The next day, still feeling slightly guilty, the doctor prepared the bills.
When he went to place them in his mailbox, he found a bill from the lawyer.

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