EMERGENCY CALL - VERY FUNNY JOKE

Boy: *calls 📱 911* Hello? I need your help!

911: Alright, What is it?

Boy: Two girls 👧 are fighting over me!

911: So what's your emergency?

Boy: The ugly 😬 one is winning.

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LADIES FIRST - FUNNY ONE LINER JOKE

Ladies first. Pretty ladies sooner.

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GIRLFRIEND KI TAREEF - HILARIOUS PAPPU JOKE

Pappu apmi girlfriend k husn ki tareef kartay huye bola,
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Pappu: "Tumhari aankhein kitni haseen hein."
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Larki: "Janu, Chhorro na."
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Pappu: "Tumharay baal kitnay khoobsurat hein."
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Larki: "Chhorro na yeh sab."
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Pappu: "Tumharay gaal kitnay gulabi hein."
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Larki: "Ab chhorro bhi."
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Pappu: "Aray, Itni dair se lambi-lambi hi to chhor raha hoon.

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REALLY FUNNY URDU JOKES - SURPRISE

Aik khatoon ne dukan mein pohnch kar salesman se kaha: "Main apnay kuttay k liye jarsi bun'na chahti hoon, mujhay kitni oon khareedni chahiye?"
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"Agar aap kuttay ko andar lay aaein to ham andaza laga kar bata saktay hein." Salesman ne mashwara diya.
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"Nahi nahi, main ussay hargiz andar nahi la sakti." Khatoon jaldi se boleen: "Main to ussay surprise dena chahti hoon."

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VERY FUNNY URDU JOKES - 90 LAAKH KI ZUROORAT

Chaar (4) larkiyon k baap ne akhbar mein ishtehar diya k jo larka meri kisi larki se shaadi karay ga, ussay larki ki umar k mutabiq utnay hi laakh rupay jahaiz mein naqad diye jaein gay.
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Doosray din aik phone mosool hua: "Hello! Inn chaaron mein koi 90 saal ki bhi hai?"

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HILARIOUS JOKES - THE BETTER ONE

Two little boys were arguing.

“My father is better than your father!”

“No he’s not!”

“My brother is better than your brother!”

“No he’s not!”

“My mother is better than your mother!”

The second boy paused. “Well I guess you’ve got me there. My father says the same thing.”

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VERY VERY FUNNY EXAMS JOKES - KAMEENAY

Aik larki rastay mein khushi se seeti bajatay huye ja rahi thi...
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Old man: "Beti kiya bat hai, itni khush kion ho?'
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Girl: "Uncle, kameeno k exams hein to raastay khali hein."

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VERY VERY FUNNY INSULT JOKE - PAISAY

"SUPERB INSULT"



Girl: "Agar paisay darakhton par ugtay,,, to...?"
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Boy: "Phir to larkiyan bandaron se bhi set ho jaya karteen."

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HILARIOUS TRAVELING JOKES - MY PARTNER

A businessman was having a tough time lugging his lumpy, oversize travel bag onto the plane.
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Helped by a flight attendant, he finally managed to stuff it in the overhead bin.
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"Do you always carry such heavy luggage?" she sighed.
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"No more," the man said: "Next time, I'm riding in the bag, and my partner can buy the ticket!

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MOST HILARIOUS JOKE - SUPER INSULT

Boy: "Kya tum meri zindagi mein chand ban'na pasand karo gi?"
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Girl: "Yes."
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Boy: "To jitna door chand hai, utni door dafa ho jao meri nazron se..."

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MOST FUNNY SARDAR'S JOKES - SALGIRAH

"Shadi ki salgirah per sardar biwi k liye 'Gulab' k phool lay aaya."
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Biwi: "Mujhay yeh nahi chahiye, mujhay koi sonay ki cheez do."
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Sardar: "Yeh lo 'Takiya' aur so jao."

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REALLY FUNNY URDU JOKE - MALE AUR FEMALE

Wife: "Kya kar rahay ho?"
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Husband: "Makhiyan mar raha hoon..."
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Wife: "Kitni maarein?"
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Husband: "3 female aur 2 male."
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Wife: "Tumhein kaisay pata male aur female ka?"
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Husband: "3 sheeshay k samnay bethi theen, aur 2 'Gold Leaf' ki dabbi par."

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MOST HILARIOUS SHORT URDU JOKES - PHOTO

Boy: "Kahan ja rahi ho?"
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Larki: "Khudkushi karnay."
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Boy: "To itna make-up kion kiya hai?"
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Girl: "Kal subh k news paper mein photo b to aani hai na?"

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VERY VERY FUNNY ENGLISH JOKES - PROBLEM

The awkward moment when someone asks: "What's wrong?"
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"And they're the problem."

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VERY VERY FUNNY ONE LINER - ONION

"My wallet is like an onion. When I open it, I cry..."

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HUMOROUS ONE LINER - NIGHTMARE

"Everyone has that scary nightmare from your childhood that you still remember..."

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MOST FUNNY ONE LINERS - BEST LIAR

"Some people don't change, they just learn to lie batter..."

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MOST HILARIOUS MARRIAGE JOKE - FOOL

Following a bitter divorce a husband saw his wife at a party and sneered: "You know, I was a fool when I married you."

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The wife simply sighed and replied, "Yes, dear, I know, but I was in love and didn't really notice."

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MOST HILARIOUS ENGLISH JOKES - THREE GUYS

Three guys are in a Cessna.

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The first drops a penny out the window.

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The second drops a pencil and the third a bomb.

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When the plane lands, the first guy goes to see where the penny landed.

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He sees a guy swearing and trying to get a penny out of his forehead.

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The second sees a girl holding her dog who has a pencil through his head.

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The third guy sees a guy laughing his head off.

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He asks: "Why are you laughing?"

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The guy says: "I was cooking on my BBQ when I farted..."

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"What's so funny about that?"

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"It blew my neighbor's house apart!"

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HUMOROUS ONE LINER - AWESOME

"My daily routine: Wake up, be awesome, go back to sleep."

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