"What made you marry Daddy, Mummy?"
"So you're beginning to wonder, too!"
"So you're beginning to wonder, too!"
Showing posts with label Mothers Jokes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Mothers Jokes. Show all posts
NEXT BABY - VERY FUNNY HUSBAND JOKES
After they had brought their first baby home from hospital,
A young wife suggested to her husband that he try his hand at changing diapers,
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"I'm busy," he said:
"I'll do the next one."
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The next time the baby was wet, she asked if he was now ready to learn how to change diapers.
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He looked puzzled. "Oh," he replied finally. "I didn't mean the next diaper. I meant the next baby!"
A young wife suggested to her husband that he try his hand at changing diapers,
,
"I'm busy," he said:
"I'll do the next one."
.
The next time the baby was wet, she asked if he was now ready to learn how to change diapers.
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He looked puzzled. "Oh," he replied finally. "I didn't mean the next diaper. I meant the next baby!"
MY MOTHER HELPS ME - VERY FUNNY CHILDREN JOKES
A small Indian boy appeared in the class of a London schoolteacher for the
first time and she asked him his name:
"Venkataratnam Narasimha Rattaiah," he said.
When she asked, "How do you spell it?"
He replied: "My mother helps me."
"Venkataratnam Narasimha Rattaiah," he said.
When she asked, "How do you spell it?"
He replied: "My mother helps me."
VERY VERY FUNNY ENGLISH JOKES - TRUTH
A father came home from a long business trip to find his son riding a very fancy new 10 speed bike. "Where did you get the money for the bike? It must have cost $300."
"Easy, Dad," the boy replied. "I earned it hiking."
"Come on," the father said. "Tell me the truth."
"That is the truth," the boy replied. "Every night you were gone, Mr. Reynolds from the grocery store would come over to see Mom. He'd give me a $20 bill and tell me to take a hike!"
"Easy, Dad," the boy replied. "I earned it hiking."
"Come on," the father said. "Tell me the truth."
"That is the truth," the boy replied. "Every night you were gone, Mr. Reynolds from the grocery store would come over to see Mom. He'd give me a $20 bill and tell me to take a hike!"
VERY FUNNY ONE LINER - JEALOUSY
"I'm jealous of my parents. I'll never have a kid as cool as theirs."
VERY FUNNY POLICE JOKES - MESSAGE
A woman reported the disappearance of her husband to the police.
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The officer looked at the guy's photograph, questioned her, and then asked if she wanted to give her husband any message if they found him.
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"Yes, please" she replied: "Tell him Mother didn't come after all."
MOST FUNNY SHORT URDU JOKES - ITTAFAAQ SE
Teacher: "Ittafaaq' ka jumla banao?"
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Student: "Jiss din meray abbu ki shaadi thi, Ittafaaq se ussi din meri ammi ki bhi shaadi thi."
HUMOROUS ONE LINER - NIGHTMARE
"Everyone has that scary nightmare from your childhood that you still remember..."
MOST HUMOROUS ENGLISH JOKE - LITTLE GIRL
To stop her 4-year old daughter from biting her nails, her mother tells her it'll make her fat.
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"I won't do it any more, Mom," says the daughter.
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Next day they are out walking when they meet a very fat man.
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"If I bite my fingernails, I'll be as fat as that, won't I Mom?"
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"You'll be fatter than that," says her mother.
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They get on a bus, and sitting opposite them is a very pregnant lady.
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The little girl can't take her eyes off the woman's belly.
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The pregnant lady feels increasingly uncomfortable under this stare, and finally leans forward and says to the little girl, "Excuse me, but do you know me?"
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And the little girl says, "No, but I know what you've been doing."
REALLY FUNNY TWEET - MISSED CALLS
"Horror movies don't scare me. 5 missed calls from 'Mom' scares me..."
MOST HUMOROUS URDU JOKE - JANNAT 2
Sardar: "Yar agar maa k qadmon talay 'JANNAT' hoti hai to phir nani k qadmon talay kya hota hai?"
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Pathan ne kafi ghour-o-ghouz k baad jawab diya: "Jannat 2."
FUNNY ONE LINERS - MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT
"I hate waking up in the middle of the night and not being able to fall back to sleep."
FUNNY EXAMS ONE LINER - PREPARATION OF EXAMS
Question: "How to prepare for exams?"
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Answer: "Start crying."
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Answer: "Start crying."
HUMOROUS STATUS - RESPONSE
"That awkward moment when you were pretending to listen and now you realize a response is required..."
HILARIOUS CLASSROOM JOKES - GO TO HELL
Teacher: Why are you at school so early?
Kid: My mom told me to go to hell...
Kid: My mom told me to go to hell...
HILARIOUS JOKES - SAYING THE BLESSING
At the table, she turned to their six-year-old daughter and said, “Would you like to say the blessing?”
“I wouldn’t know what to say,” the girl replied.
“Just say what you hear Mommy say,” the wife answered.
The daughter bowed her head and said,
“Lord, why on earth did I invite all these people to dinner?”
“I wouldn’t know what to say,” the girl replied.
“Just say what you hear Mommy say,” the wife answered.
The daughter bowed her head and said,
“Lord, why on earth did I invite all these people to dinner?”
HILARIOUS JOKES - JUST LAUGHING
Little Johnny came downstairs crying loudly.
"What's the matter?" asked his mother.
"Papa was hanging pictures, and he just hit his thumb with a hammer," said Johnny.
"That's not so serious," soothed his mother. A big man like you shouldn't cry at a trifle like that. Why didn't you just laugh?"
"I did," sobbed Little Johnny.
"What's the matter?" asked his mother.
"Papa was hanging pictures, and he just hit his thumb with a hammer," said Johnny.
"That's not so serious," soothed his mother. A big man like you shouldn't cry at a trifle like that. Why didn't you just laugh?"
"I did," sobbed Little Johnny.
FUNNY SHORT JOKES - DEALING WITH A BURGLER
A woman woke her husband in the middle of the night and told him "There is a burglar downstairs in the kitchen and he is eating the cake that my mother made for us."
The husband said, "Who shall I call, the police or an ambulance?"
The husband said, "Who shall I call, the police or an ambulance?"
