Sardar ji pathan se: "Khan sahb kya tum angraizi jantay ho?"
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Pathan: "Han! Agar urdu mein boli jaye."
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Pathan: "Han! Agar urdu mein boli jaye."
Showing posts with label Sardar Jokes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Sardar Jokes. Show all posts
VERY VERY FUNNY URDU JOKES - PATHAN KA MASHWARA
Sardar apnay dost pathan se: "Yar! Meri aankh mein bohat dard hai, kuch illaj to batao."
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Pathan: "Meray daant mein dard tha main ne nikalwa diya, tum bhi aisa ki karo. Dard jata rahay ga.
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Pathan: "Meray daant mein dard tha main ne nikalwa diya, tum bhi aisa ki karo. Dard jata rahay ga.
FUNNY URDU JOKES - TEEN GAPPI DOST
Teen (3) dost gappein laga rahay thay.
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Pehla dost bola: "Kal main jungle mein gaya, main ne wahan teen (3) sher daikhay, main ne unn teeno ko aik line mein kharra kiya aur goli maar di, woh teeno mar gaye."
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Doosra dost: "Kal main jungle mein gaya to main ne do sher kharray daikhay, main ne unn ko bandooq dikhaee woh dono waheen mar gaye."
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Teesra dost: "Kal main ne jungle mein sirf aik sher kharra daikha, main ne uss se kaha: "Tum jungle k badshah honay k bawujood nangay paon phir rahay ho to woh sharam k maaray waheen mar gaya."
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Pehla dost bola: "Kal main jungle mein gaya, main ne wahan teen (3) sher daikhay, main ne unn teeno ko aik line mein kharra kiya aur goli maar di, woh teeno mar gaye."
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Doosra dost: "Kal main jungle mein gaya to main ne do sher kharray daikhay, main ne unn ko bandooq dikhaee woh dono waheen mar gaye."
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Teesra dost: "Kal main ne jungle mein sirf aik sher kharra daikha, main ne uss se kaha: "Tum jungle k badshah honay k bawujood nangay paon phir rahay ho to woh sharam k maaray waheen mar gaya."
FUNNY URDU JOKES - ANGOOR
Aik saiyyah pehli martaba Pakistan aaya.
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Aik phall ki dukan per ja kar uss ne kailay ki taraf ishara kartay huye poocha: "Yeh kya hai?"
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Dukandar ne jawab diya: "Yeh kailay hein."
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Saiyyah kehnay laga: "Hamaray mulk mein to dhaee dhaee foot lambay kailay hotay hein."
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Phir uss ne saib ki taraf ishara kar k poocha.
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Dukandar ne jawab diya: "Yeh saib hein."
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Saiyyah jhatt se bola: "Hamaray mulk mein to paanch (5) paanch (5) kilo k saib hotay hein."
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Phir uss ne tarbooz ki taraf ishara kiya to dukandar aajzi se bola: "Janab! Yeh angoor hein."
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Aik phall ki dukan per ja kar uss ne kailay ki taraf ishara kartay huye poocha: "Yeh kya hai?"
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Dukandar ne jawab diya: "Yeh kailay hein."
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Saiyyah kehnay laga: "Hamaray mulk mein to dhaee dhaee foot lambay kailay hotay hein."
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Phir uss ne saib ki taraf ishara kar k poocha.
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Dukandar ne jawab diya: "Yeh saib hein."
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Saiyyah jhatt se bola: "Hamaray mulk mein to paanch (5) paanch (5) kilo k saib hotay hein."
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Phir uss ne tarbooz ki taraf ishara kiya to dukandar aajzi se bola: "Janab! Yeh angoor hein."
FUNNY URDU JOKES - TEEN DOST
Teen (3) dost aapas mein iss baat per behas kar rahay thay k woh paisay ko koi ehmiyat nahi detay aur paisay ko haath ka mael samjhtay hein.
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Aik dost ne jaib se so (100) rupay ka note nikala aur ussay jala kar raakh kar diya.
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Doosra dost yeh daikh kar hansa aur jaib se paanch so (500) ka nikala aur ussay jala diya.
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Teesray dost ne yeh daikh kar qehqaha lagaya aur kaha: "Bus! Itni se? Ab mujhay daikho."
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Aur yeh keh kar uss ne jaib se check book nikali, check per dass hazaar (10,000) ki raqam likhi, dastakht kiye aur aag laga di.
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Aik dost ne jaib se so (100) rupay ka note nikala aur ussay jala kar raakh kar diya.
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Doosra dost yeh daikh kar hansa aur jaib se paanch so (500) ka nikala aur ussay jala diya.
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Teesray dost ne yeh daikh kar qehqaha lagaya aur kaha: "Bus! Itni se? Ab mujhay daikho."
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Aur yeh keh kar uss ne jaib se check book nikali, check per dass hazaar (10,000) ki raqam likhi, dastakht kiye aur aag laga di.
VERY FUNNY URDU JOKES - NAQAL
Sajid (Naveed se): "Tum ne parcha kaisa diya?"
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Naveed: "Kya bataon yar, bus khali day kar aaya hoon, acha Sajid tum sunao tumhara parcha kaisa hua?"
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Sajid: "Bhaee! Aakhir tumhara dost hoon, main bhi khali parcha day kar aaya hoon."
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Naveed: "Aray aray! Ghazab ho gaya yar, Sir samjhein gay k ham dono ne naqal ki hai."
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Naveed: "Kya bataon yar, bus khali day kar aaya hoon, acha Sajid tum sunao tumhara parcha kaisa hua?"
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Sajid: "Bhaee! Aakhir tumhara dost hoon, main bhi khali parcha day kar aaya hoon."
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Naveed: "Aray aray! Ghazab ho gaya yar, Sir samjhein gay k ham dono ne naqal ki hai."
FUNNY URDU JOKES - QUAID-E-AZAM
Aik dafa Jawaharlal Nehru ne Quaid-e-Azam se poocha: "Janab! Yeh kya majra hai k jab main ulta kharra hota hoon to meray jisam k khoon meray sar mein jama ho jata hai, magar jab main seedha kharra hota hoon to woh paon mein jama kion nahi hota?"
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Iss per Quaid-e-Azam ne nehayat aqal mandi aur hazir jawabi se kaha: "Jo cheez khali ho gi khoon to ussi mein jama ho ga."
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Iss per Quaid-e-Azam ne nehayat aqal mandi aur hazir jawabi se kaha: "Jo cheez khali ho gi khoon to ussi mein jama ho ga."
URDU JOKES - FASHIONABLE HOTEL
Aik dehati kisi fashionable hotel mein gaya aur chaye peenay ki khawhish ki.
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Waiter chaye ki chhoti si peyali mein chaye lay aaya.
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Jo dehati ne aik ghoont mein khatam kar di aur waiter se mukhatib hua: "Bhai sahb! Meetha theek hai, ab chaye lay bhi aao."
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Waiter chaye ki chhoti si peyali mein chaye lay aaya.
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Jo dehati ne aik ghoont mein khatam kar di aur waiter se mukhatib hua: "Bhai sahb! Meetha theek hai, ab chaye lay bhi aao."
REALLY FUNNY URDU JOKES - ROAST RAAN
Gahak ne roat raan ka order diya to bairay ne moaddab ho kar poocha: "Janab! Iss k saath kuch aur bhi pasand karein gay?"
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Gahak bola: "Haan! Agar raan pichlay haftay jaisi hai to saath dranti bhi letay aana."
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Gahak bola: "Haan! Agar raan pichlay haftay jaisi hai to saath dranti bhi letay aana."
FUNNY URDU JOKES - BADSHAH AUR MASKHARA
Badshah ne apnay maskharay mulazim se kaha: "Raat main ne khawb daikha k tum ganday pani mein ho aur main shehad mein naha raha hoon."
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Maskharay ne foran jawab diya: "Huzoor! Main ne bhi khawb daikha k aap mujhay aur main aap ko chaat raha hoon."
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Maskharay ne foran jawab diya: "Huzoor! Main ne bhi khawb daikha k aap mujhay aur main aap ko chaat raha hoon."
REALLY FUNNY URDU JOKES - TRAFFIC POLICE
Sardar: "Duniya ka sab se taqatwar insan kaun hai?"
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Pathan: "Meray abbu."
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Sardar: "Woh kaisay?"
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Pathan: "Woh aik haath k isharay se sainkarron logon ko rok letay hein."
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Sardar: "Woh kya kartay hein?"
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Pathan: "Woh traffic police mein Sargent hein."
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Pathan: "Meray abbu."
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Sardar: "Woh kaisay?"
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Pathan: "Woh aik haath k isharay se sainkarron logon ko rok letay hein."
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Sardar: "Woh kya kartay hein?"
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Pathan: "Woh traffic police mein Sargent hein."
VERY FUNNY URDU JOKES - DO PATHAN DOST
Do pathan raat ko kaheen ja rahay thay.
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Aik k haath mein battery thi.
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Battery wala pathan bola: "Yaar! Main battery roshan karta hoon, tum roshni pakarr kar aasmaan per chalay jao."
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Doosray pathan ne jawab diya: "Wah wah! Mujhay pagal banatay ho? Main abhi aadhay raastay mein hi hoon ga aur tum roshni band kar do gay aur main neechay gir jaon ga."
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Aik k haath mein battery thi.
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Battery wala pathan bola: "Yaar! Main battery roshan karta hoon, tum roshni pakarr kar aasmaan per chalay jao."
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Doosray pathan ne jawab diya: "Wah wah! Mujhay pagal banatay ho? Main abhi aadhay raastay mein hi hoon ga aur tum roshni band kar do gay aur main neechay gir jaon ga."
FUNNY URDU JOKES - SARDAR JI KA ACCIDENT
Aik sardar ji pehli baar bus mein sawar huye.
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Bus jab manzil k qareeb pohnchi to aik darakht se ja takraee.
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Sardar ji aagay baithay thay, iss liye ussay zyada chotein aaein, woh himmat kar k kharray huye aur maathay se khoon poonchtay huye driver se kehnay lagay: "Kion bhai! Jahan darakht nahi hotay wahan aap kaisay bus roktay hein?"
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Bus jab manzil k qareeb pohnchi to aik darakht se ja takraee.
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Sardar ji aagay baithay thay, iss liye ussay zyada chotein aaein, woh himmat kar k kharray huye aur maathay se khoon poonchtay huye driver se kehnay lagay: "Kion bhai! Jahan darakht nahi hotay wahan aap kaisay bus roktay hein?"
VERY VERY FUNNY URDU JOKES - SHEIKH
Bhikari: "Paanch (5) rupay ka sawal hai baba!"
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Sheikh: "Chalo poocho, shayed mujhay aata ho."
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Sheikh: "Chalo poocho, shayed mujhay aata ho."
REALLY FUNNY URDU JOKES - BHIKARI
Bhikari (aadmi se): "Bhai do (2) rupay ka sawal hai."
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Aadmi: "Sirf do (2) hi kion?"
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Bhikari: "Main aadmi ki auqaat daikh kar hi baat karta hoon."
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Aadmi: "Sirf do (2) hi kion?"
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Bhikari: "Main aadmi ki auqaat daikh kar hi baat karta hoon."
VERY FUNNY URDU JOKES - DAAKU
Aik sardar ji television per aik program daikh raha tha aur saath saath ro bhi rahay thay.
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Issi doran mein uss ka aik pathan dost uss se milnay aaya aur ronay ki wajah daryaft ki to unhon ne bataya: "Mera inaam nikal aaya hai."
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Pathan ne kaha: "Yeh to bohat khushi ki baat hai, magar tum ro kion rahay ho?"
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Sardar ji bolay: "Main iss liye ro raha hoon kion k yeh program daaku bhi bohat shoq se daikhtay hein."
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Issi doran mein uss ka aik pathan dost uss se milnay aaya aur ronay ki wajah daryaft ki to unhon ne bataya: "Mera inaam nikal aaya hai."
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Pathan ne kaha: "Yeh to bohat khushi ki baat hai, magar tum ro kion rahay ho?"
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Sardar ji bolay: "Main iss liye ro raha hoon kion k yeh program daaku bhi bohat shoq se daikhtay hein."
FUNNY URDU JOKES - BHIKARI AUR CHOKIDAR
Aik bhikari bank k darwazy se andar dakhil honay laga to chokidar ne ussay rok kar kaha: "Jao baba! Muaf karo."
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Bhikari ne chokidar ko ghoortay huye kaha: "Bewaqoof aadmi! Main yahan bheek mangnay nahi aaya, balkeh apnay account mein dass hazaar (10,000) rupay jama karanay aaya hoon."
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Bhikari ne chokidar ko ghoortay huye kaha: "Bewaqoof aadmi! Main yahan bheek mangnay nahi aaya, balkeh apnay account mein dass hazaar (10,000) rupay jama karanay aaya hoon."
VERY FUNNY URDU JOKES - DEHATI AUR PILOT
Aik dehati pehli baar jahaz mein sawar hua aur pilot se bola: "Chalo bhai! Chaltay kion nahi ho?"
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Pilot ne ghussay se kaha: "Yeh gaarri nahi, hawaee jahaz hai."
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Dehati ne phir poocha: "Iss mein tail to poora hai na?"
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Pilot: "Kion? Tumhein tail ki kya fikar hai?"
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Dehati: "Upper ja kar tail khatam ho gaya to tum kaho gay, chalo neechay utar kar dhakka lagao, phir?"
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Pilot ne ghussay se kaha: "Yeh gaarri nahi, hawaee jahaz hai."
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Dehati ne phir poocha: "Iss mein tail to poora hai na?"
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Pilot: "Kion? Tumhein tail ki kya fikar hai?"
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Dehati: "Upper ja kar tail khatam ho gaya to tum kaho gay, chalo neechay utar kar dhakka lagao, phir?"
VERY FUNNY URDU JOKES - SARDAR AUR PATHAN
Aik pathan (sardar se): "Daikho! Tumharay naak per makhi baithi huee hai."
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Sardar: "Koi baat nahi, kisi din moqa mila to main bhi uss ki naak per charrh jaon ga."
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Sardar: "Koi baat nahi, kisi din moqa mila to main bhi uss ki naak per charrh jaon ga."
FUNNY URDU JOKES - SARDAR AND BACHI
1st Sardar: Oye yaaaaaaaaar! Bachi check kar...
2nd Sardar: Oye! Wo meri baaji hai.
1st Sardar: Oh, sorry yar. Baji check kar!
2nd Sardar: Qasmay tabaayi ay yaaaaaaaaaaaaaar!
2nd Sardar: Oye! Wo meri baaji hai.
1st Sardar: Oh, sorry yar. Baji check kar!
2nd Sardar: Qasmay tabaayi ay yaaaaaaaaaaaaaar!
