FUNNY URDU JOKES - QUAID-E-AZAM

Aik dafa Jawaharlal Nehru ne Quaid-e-Azam se poocha: "Janab! Yeh kya majra hai k jab main ulta kharra hota hoon to meray jisam k khoon meray sar mein jama ho jata hai, magar jab main seedha kharra hota hoon to woh paon mein jama kion nahi hota?"
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Iss per Quaid-e-Azam ne nehayat aqal mandi aur hazir jawabi se kaha: "Jo cheez khali ho gi khoon to ussi mein jama ho ga."

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URDU JOKES - FASHIONABLE HOTEL

Aik dehati kisi fashionable hotel mein gaya aur chaye peenay ki khawhish ki.
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Waiter chaye ki chhoti si peyali mein chaye lay aaya.
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Jo dehati ne aik ghoont mein khatam kar di aur waiter se mukhatib hua: "Bhai sahb! Meetha theek hai, ab chaye lay bhi aao."

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REALLY FUNNY URDU JOKES - ROAST RAAN

Gahak ne roat raan ka order diya to bairay ne moaddab ho kar poocha: "Janab! Iss k saath kuch aur bhi pasand karein gay?"
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Gahak bola: "Haan! Agar raan pichlay haftay jaisi hai to saath dranti bhi letay aana."

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FUNNY URDU JOKES - BADSHAH AUR MASKHARA

Badshah ne apnay maskharay mulazim se kaha: "Raat main ne khawb daikha k tum ganday pani mein ho aur main shehad mein naha raha hoon."
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Maskharay ne foran jawab diya: "Huzoor! Main ne bhi khawb daikha k aap mujhay aur main aap ko chaat raha hoon."

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REALLY FUNNY URDU JOKES - TRAFFIC POLICE

Sardar: "Duniya ka sab se taqatwar insan kaun hai?"
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Pathan: "Meray abbu."
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Sardar: "Woh kaisay?"
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Pathan: "Woh aik haath k isharay se sainkarron logon ko rok letay hein."
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Sardar: "Woh kya kartay hein?"
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Pathan: "Woh traffic police mein Sargent hein."

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VERY FUNNY URDU JOKES - DO PATHAN DOST

Do pathan raat ko kaheen ja rahay thay.
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Aik k haath mein battery thi.
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Battery wala pathan bola: "Yaar! Main battery roshan karta hoon, tum roshni pakarr kar aasmaan per chalay jao."
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Doosray pathan ne jawab diya: "Wah wah! Mujhay pagal banatay ho? Main abhi aadhay raastay mein hi hoon ga aur tum roshni band kar do gay aur main neechay gir jaon ga."

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VERY VERY FUNNY URDU JOKES - SHEIKH

Bhikari: "Paanch (5) rupay ka sawal hai baba!"
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Sheikh: "Chalo poocho, shayed mujhay aata ho."

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VERY FUNNY URDU JOKES - DAAKU

Aik sardar ji television per aik program daikh raha tha aur saath saath ro bhi rahay thay.
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Issi doran mein uss ka aik pathan dost uss se milnay aaya aur ronay ki wajah daryaft ki to unhon ne bataya: "Mera inaam nikal aaya hai."
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Pathan ne kaha: "Yeh to bohat khushi ki baat hai, magar tum ro kion rahay ho?"
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Sardar ji bolay: "Main iss liye ro raha hoon kion k yeh program daaku bhi bohat shoq se daikhtay hein."

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VERY FUNNY URDU JOKES - DEHATI AUR PILOT

Aik dehati pehli baar jahaz mein sawar hua aur pilot se bola: "Chalo bhai! Chaltay kion nahi ho?"
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Pilot ne ghussay se kaha: "Yeh gaarri nahi, hawaee jahaz hai."
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Dehati ne phir poocha: "Iss mein tail to poora hai na?"
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Pilot: "Kion? Tumhein tail ki kya fikar hai?"
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Dehati: "Upper ja kar tail khatam ho gaya to tum kaho gay, chalo neechay utar kar dhakka lagao, phir?"

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VERY FUNNY URDU JOKES - SARDAR AUR PATHAN

Aik pathan (sardar se): "Daikho! Tumharay naak per makhi baithi huee hai."
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Sardar: "Koi baat nahi, kisi din moqa mila to main bhi uss ki naak per charrh jaon ga."

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FUNNY URDU JOKES - DOCTOR AUR PAGAL

Ail pagal pagal khanay se kamyaab illaj k baad jab rukhsat honay laga to pagal khanay k doctor ne ussay mukhatib kartay huye poocha: "Kion janab! Ab aap kaisa mehsoos kar rahay hein? Aap sehat yaab ho kar wapas jatay huye khush to hein na?"
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Sabqa pagal rohansa ho kar bola: "Khaak khush hoon, jab main yahan aaya tha to main america ka sadar tha ab aam aadmi ban kar bahar ja raha hoon."

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FUNNY URDU JOKES - SARDAR KI BIWI

Sardar pathan se: "Main apni biwi se tang aa chuka hoon."
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Pathan: "Kion?"
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Sardar: "Jhoot bohat bolti hai."
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Pathan: "Tumhein kaisay pata chala?"
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Sardar: "Uss ne aaj subh mujhay bataya k woh kal raat apni saheli k haan soee thi, halankeh uss ki saheli k haan pichli raat mera qayam tha."

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REALLY FUNNY URDU JOKES - PATHAN AUR SARDAR

Shehar ki masroof tareen shahrah per ain wast mein aik pathan ne apni cycle rok kar stand per kharri kar di aur aik dam se tiffan haath mein lay kar khol kar daikhnay laga.
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Rush tha traffic jam ho gaee.
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Aik sardar ji gaarri se utray aur uss k paas aa kar intehaee ghussay se bolay: "Khan sahb! Yeh kya harkat hai?"
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Khan sahb itminan se bolay: "Khocha! Ham check kar raha tha apna lunch box... Agar yeh khali hota to iss ka matlab hai amm duty kar chuka hai aur ghar ja raha hai aur agar lunch mojood hai to phir amm duty per ja raha hai."

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FUNNY URDU JOKES - SARDAR KA KARNAMA

Sardar apnay dost pathan ko bata raha tha: "Kal main ne tair kar darya paar karnay ka irada kiya lekin bilkul darmeyan mein pohnch kar thak gaya."
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Pathan barray tajassus se: "Phir kya hua?"
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"Hona kya tha?... Main darmeyan mein se palat kar phir wapas ussi kinaray per aa gaya." Sardar ne aqalmandi ka muzahira kartay huye kaha.

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FUNNY URDU JOKES - MACHAR DAANI

Rasheed: "Aray Jamshed! Tum machar dani se bahar kion so rahay ho?"
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Jamshed: "Yar! Machron ko dhoka denay k liye, woh samjhein gay k main machar dani k andar hoon."

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VERY FUNNY URDU JOKES - GHEE 200 RUPAY KILO

Khareedar (dukandar se): "Ghee kya bhao hai?"
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Dukandar: "Do so (200) rupay kilo."
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Khareedar: "Aik raupay ka day do."
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Dukandar: "Aik minute soongh lo."

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FUNNY URDU JOKES - BAKRA YA KUTTA

Pathan: "Yeh bakra 9500 ka hai, yeh 8,000 ka, woh 7,000 aur woh wala sirf 500 ka hai.
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Gahak: "500 ka kion?"
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Pathan: "O khocha! China ka hai na, koi gaurantee nahi hai, chahay ghar ja kar bhonkna shuru kar day."

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VERY VERY FUNNY URDU JOKES - BHEEK

Aik sahb ne gadagar ko dant'tay huye kaha: "Ghar ghar ja kar bheek mangtay huye sharam nahi aati kya?"
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"Kya karon, meray ghar aa kar koi deta hi nahi hai." Gadagar ne jawab diya.

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FUNNY URDU JOKES - FUNNY PATHAN

Wedding night ko pathan room mein jatay hi apni biwi se bola: "Jaldi so jao, kal valima mein bhi jana hai."

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FUNNY URDU JOKES - CONFUSE PATHAN

Shaadi ki raat pathan confuse ho gaya k apni naee biwi se kya bolay?
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Aakhir woh bola: "Tumhara ghar walon k maloom hai keh tum yahan hamaray saath ho?"

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